Brandy AlexANNEder (Sorry, I couldn't resist)

Three cocktails in, and I'm already sick of those that have creamy consistency. This is not good.

Mind you, the Brandy Alexander looks pretty, and it's easy to make. And, this cocktail did allow me to learn an important lesson about dairy products. One of the ingredients of the cocktail is cream. You cannot buy "cream" at the local Randall's. You can buy "heavy whipping cream," and just the thought of "heavy" made my stomach say "no." So, I thought that perhaps half-and-half would do the job.

This was not a bad idea.

Then I saw "fat-free half-and-half."

This was a bad idea.

I know that fat-free half-and-half is a lie. It cannot truly exist. Cream by its nature has fat in it. I know this. I know it. But, I had not experienced it. See, there's a difference between knowing a thing with your brain, and knowing it with your gullet. The gullet wanted proof.

I bought the fat-free half-and-half.

Mixing up the drink was fine, and I somehow managed to forget that I had purchased a paradoxical dairy product.

My first thought in the drinking ... "Watery."

Lesson learned. Ingredients make or break a cocktail. But, I still say that the drink would have worked with half-and-half.

Here's What You Need to Make a Brandy Alexander:

• ice
• 1 oz brandy
• 1 1/2 oz cream
• 1/2 oz brown creme de cacao
• shaker
• chilled cocktail glass
  

Here's How Anne Made It:
Substitute fat-free half-and-half for the cream, pour all the ingredients into the shaker. Shake. Pour into cocktail glass and wonder how dairy producers can get away with such an obvious lie.


Manly or Girly? Fairly girly
Appearance: Weak chocolate milk
Consistency: Depends on what kind of cream you use, really
Taste: Sweet, but not too sweet. Taste-wise, it wasn't that bad
Stomach acceptance: Cream would have sat in my stomach and pouted, half-and-half was better
Good drink for: Fall, indoor bar with wood paneling, as a dessert
Hangover factor: Very little. Dessert drinks are not consumed to the point of hangoveredness
Would I actually order this in public? I might. I'm not super-enthused by the Brandy Alexander, but it's not too bad. I'd recommend it to some of my wimpier friends who don't like the taste of alcohol

Tomorrow's Assignment (and I can't believe I'm saying this): Buttery Nipple

Homework for tonight:

• ice
• 1 oz Bailey's
• 1 oz Butterscotch Schnapps
  
• rock glass